Reasons To Feel Less Nervous About Trying Something New
I get it. Trying new things can be daunting.
Whether it’s stepping into a class for the first time and you don’t know anyone, or joining a workshop and you haven’t got a clue what you’re going to be doing.
Perhaps taking part in an activity outside of your comfort zone brings you out in a sweat just thinking about it. Maybe it’s the worry that you’ll not be able to do what is being asked of you, or the fear that you’ll look foolish. You’re definitely not alone.
There are lots of people who struggle with the fear of trying something new, also known as neophobia.
The good news is, there are plenty of reasons to feel less nervous about trying something new.
Learning Through Experience
I used to be nervous about all of those things. Whilst I do still get that familiar feeling of adrenaline mingled with anxiousness and crossed with nerves when I try something for the first time, I’ve managed to re-frame my thinking.
Having tried fifty-two new experiences a year since 2018, I now go into new experiences with a sense of excitement, and actually look forward to whatever is going to be thrown my way!
To help you to feel less nervous about trying something new, I thought I’d share my learnings from my years of seeking out new things. I hope that one or two of them might help.
1. No One Is Looking At You
Unless you’re trying something like stand-up comedy, singing, or anything involving performance, then of course the purpose is for people to look at you. There’s no getting away from it in those situations, sorry!
However, if you’re going to a workshop or a class, or trying anything in a group setting, the reality is that other people are generally so engrossed in their own experience that they don’t have time to be looking at you.
People will be watching the instructor and then paying attention to putting things into practice themselves. They generally won’t have time to be looking at you.
Yes, there may be the occasional glance over from others. Usually though, it’s because they’re they’re looking for reassurance that they’re doing the same thing as everyone else, or to see if other people are getting along at a similar pace. I know I’ve definitely done that side eye on some occassions! It’s very unlikely people will look over to you because they think you’re weird or they are laughing at you.
2. Everyone Was A Beginner Once
If you’re going to attend something that has been running for a while, it is more than likely that there will be people there who have been participating in it for a while too.
Regulars are brilliant!
I’ve often been to things that I felt nervous about and have had a chat with some regulars whilst we’ve waited for a session to begin. They typically share their initial experiences and how they’ve progressed. I found they’re still attending even if they messed up, so nothing was too bad that they couldn’t get over it. They offer reassurance about the activity and the instructor, and they can often be an extra help in the session too.
Teaching others is a brilliant way to cement learning. Regulars will usually be happy to share what they know about the activity as it’s a great way for them to check in on what they know. It’s definitely worth talking to them as it will help to build their confidence too!
3. Reasons To Feel Less Nervous About Trying Something New - Nobody Wants You To Fail
Have you ever been into a class, workshop or activity, seen a complete stranger and thought to yourself ‘I really hope they don’t do very well at this’? No?
Then why would anyone be thinking that about you?!
(If you have ever thought that, perhaps it’s worth unpacking some other time).
Whatever activity you decide to try, other participants are your unofficial cheer leaders! They typically want you to do well, even if they aren’t looking at you as we noted in an earlier point.
Quite often activity groups are looking to recruit new members. They want you to enjoy yourself and do well in the hope that you might decide to go back!
Instructors and guides are often looking for more customers. They want you to have a good experience and feel a sense of success so that you’ll tell other people who then decide to give it a go!
When you’re in a shared experience, even if it’s just an hour, there is usually some level of group bonding. People will typically encourage each other, and want everyone to enjoy a shared sense of achievement at the end.
4. Life Would Be Boring If Everything Went Well The First Time
When children are learning new things, there’s rarely an expectation for them to get it right the first time. There’s usually patience, encouragement and enthusiasm as learning is transferred to the bright eyed and curious small person.
If you’re trying something new, be kind to yourself! Yes, you may be a bit older, and you may have some frames of reference for whatever you’re trying that make you feel as though you should be able to do it, but remember – you’re never too old to be a newbie!
Cut yourself some slack. Of course there’s a higher likelihood that the first time you do something it won’t be perfect. That’s a fact. You can’t change it. Life would be boring if you could do everything brilliantly first time.
5. It Is Someone’s Livelihood
Whenever you try something new that involves a tutor or an instructor, then just remember that this is often their livelihood. They don’t want anything bad to happen to you during their activity.
The cold hard facts of it are that it could damage their reputation, and potentially cost them a lot of money if something was to go wrong. They want to keep you safe and they want you to have a good time.
Which leads nicely to a more positive note…
6. Enthusiasm Is Infectious
The people who teach classes, lead workshops, or instruct on adventures, are usually incredibly passionate about what they are doing. They want to share their passion, they want others to experience the same joy from the activity that they do.
Instructors and tutors are often enthusiastic, which typically makes learning from them so much easier. They are very encouraging, giving praise when things go well and offering helpful advice if you’re struggling. Who wouldn’t want to spend time being around people like that?!
7. Reasons To Feel Less Nervous About Trying Something New - You Are Capable Of Following Instructions
You’ve successfully been following instructions all your life. From parents and carers to teachers and managers, you’ve followed instructions since you were tiny.
If you’ve got a phone you’ll have followed some instructions in setting it up, even if you didn’t read the full multi-page manual – does anyone actually do that?! Following a SatNav is following instructions, heck, if you’ve followed a recipe that’s an instruction too!
Whatever you are thinking of trying, there are bound to be guides or helpful advice. Try and remember that you have experience in being able to successfully follow instructions. Of course, it depends on how good they are, but that’s out of your hands.
If you’re in a workshop or class you can always ask for clarification if something isn’t clear or to confirm your understanding. The chances are that other people are thinking of asking the same questions too. Trust in your ability to follow the guidance.
8. You’re Allowed To Say No
If something really doesn’t sit right with you when you’re trying something for the first time, it’s perfectly fine to say no. If you’re being asked to step further out of your comfort zone than you had envisaged, or to do something that really doesn’t feel comfortable either physically or mentally, say ‘No’.
It is good to push yourself and discover you can do things you hadn’t realised, however, an instructor won’t know what you’re capable of, or what your boundaries are the first time you do something. Tell them if it’s too much, too soon, or not what you expected. Remember from earlier – they want you to enjoy yourself, so they should respect your decision.
Just knowing that you have that in your back pocket, that you can speak up and use your voice, can give you reassurance and confidence before you embark on something new.
9. You Can Cope With More Than You Realise
Throughout your life, you’ll have been tried and tested by the huge variety of things that can be thrown your way, often when you’re least expecting it. Good things, and the not so good things.
I appreciate that some things may take a very long time to overcome, may need help to be dealt with, or may never be possible to get over, but rather adapting to.
Attending a new class, workshop, or trying a new activity should hopefully be a little less impactful. Hopefully you’re doing it because you want to.
If it’s not what you expected, if it’s not as easy as you thought, if you weren’t as good at it as you’d hoped, you’ll generally be ok. You can cope with it.
In most situations, you’ll walk away from that experience and you’ll be absolutely fine. You can chalk it up to experience, and at the very least you’ll have a story! It’s not likely that it will be something that you won’t be able to cope with.
10. How to feel less nervous about trying something new - remember, There Are No Mistakes, Just Learning Opportunities.
Trying anything new means we are more vulnerable to making mistakes. It doesn’t mean we should never try new things.
Stepping on someone’s toes in a dance class; adding too much of one ingredient in a cooking class; cutting or sticking something in the wrong way in a craft activity; going in the wrong direction during a workout; saying the wrong line in a talk – these are just a few of the things that l’ve encountered from trying new things.
There was a time I would have overthought these mishaps and let them fester in my mind for far too long, which doesn’t do anyone any good.
However, I’ve apologised to dance partners; I’ve eaten unusual tasting meals; I’ve created unique crafts and I’ve changed direction in the workout! As for the talk, well, I just carried on! Nobody knew what I was going to say, so nobody knew I’d said the wrong line!
Whilst some people might gloss over a mistake, and others might over-analyse how it has made them feel, mistakes are perfect opportunities for helping us to learn what to do differently the next time we try something. It doesn’t mean we definitely won’t ever make that mistake again, but it does mean we’ll be more aware of it happening, and may be able to catch ourselves before we trip up.
11. Repetition Makes Things Easier
The more we do things, the easier they usually become. But you’ve got to start somewhere. Repetition always has to start with a first time.
There are many things you do frequently in life. In fact, you do them so often you probably don’t even think about them. Like making a cup of tea for example. It may be that you don’t even have to think about the process. It’s almost like you’re on auto-pilot and the next thing you know, you’ve got a lovely cup of steaming goodness.
I’ve walked in to so many workshops where I haven’t known anyone, or known how to do the activity, that I definitely feel more comfortable about it now. It doesn’t phase me to enter a room of strangers and introduce myself.
Remind yourself that however nervous you may feel about trying something new today, it’ll be easier the next time, and the next time, and the next time. Your future self will usually thank you for taking that first step.
12. You Have Something To Offer
Let’s say you’re going into a workshop that you know nothing about. You’ve heard of it, but you don’t know where to start or what the experience will be like. You might think you’re just there to absorb the information and take part. Often that’s how it will feel too, but you’re also incredibly helpful to the instructor.
Even if the tutor doesn’t ask for feedback, they are often looking to see how the audience is reacting. It helps them to see what is working well and what could be improved about their session. So just by being a participant you can help shape things for the future.
Some classes give you the opportunity to meet new people. Often socialising is a key motivator for people signing up to them. You may not feel comfortable opening up too much, so remember that you’re in control of what you choose to share.
If you’re feeling nervous about attending something for the first time, remind yourself that you’ve got stories that others will want to hear, and skills that people will be interested in.
Remind Yourself, There Are Reasons To Feel Less Nervous About Trying Something New.
I know it’s easier to say these things than it often is to put them into practice. However, if you’re nervous about doing something new, I hope having a read through them might give you a bit of encouragement and a nudge of a confidence boost.
- No one is looking at you
- Everyone was a beginner once
- Nobody wants you to fail
- Life would be boring if everything went well the first time
- It is someone’s livelihood
- Enthusiasm is infectious
- You are capable of following instructions
- You’re allowed to say no
- You can cope with more than you realise
- There are no mistakes, just learning opportunities
- Repetition makes things easier
- You have something to offer
Of course there are always exceptions to rules.
You might get a duff instructor, there might be some other participants who are less than welcoming, you might not enjoy the new thing you’re trying.
Through trying fifty-two new things a year since 2018, I’ve found those negatives to be few and far between. Through my experiences, these are 12 genuine reasons to feel less nervous about trying new things. I hope they help.
And if you’re now feeling ready to take on the world and try something new, take a look at the Big List for some ideas!